The 5 Best Dating Sites for Men Over 40 – Reviews by Men
Single at 40+ is not strange – not for the modern man, at least.
Why is that?
You might be so caught up building a career that you didn’t consider romance. Or, you’re just getting over a nasty break up, and you’re ready to give love another chance.
Or, maybe you just haven’t found that “right someone” who resonates with you (yeah, you could spend over four decades searching for true love!).
Whatever your reasons, it’s perfectly okay.
The fastest way to get a date these days is online because every single person is now online! But here’s the thing, not all dating sites are created equal.
Keep reading to find out which are the best dating sites for over 40.
1. eHarmony
There’s definitely something to be said for a site that has helped over two million people across the globe to find love and lasting commitment.
Yep! Love and commitment are the watchwords when age is no longer on your side. At 40 plus, it is quite reasonable if you are less interested in random flings or hookups. And that’s what makes eHarmony one of the best dating sites for over 40.
eHarmony is among the oldest dating sites. It came into existence back in 2000 and is one of the first of its kind on the web. With over 33 million users across 200 countries, the site ranks as the number one trusted dating site in 2018, and focuses purely on fostering committed relationships.
For two decades, this online dating service has been the go-to site for many people looking to find love that lasts. You can be sure of finding quality singles from the site’s quality dating pool. These are single people who, like you, are tired of dating games.
There’s a free membership that doesn’t expire. Free members can add photos, complete their profiles, receive matches, and use some other features. However, only paid members can send and read messages.
What makes this site unique is that instead of relying on quick bios and cute photos to create matches, it adopts quizzes that assess true qualities such as personal beliefs, emotional temperaments, and family values. The site uses a scientific approach to matching highly compatible couples.
Don’t worry; it’s not a boring or complicated process. You only have to complete a compatibility quiz and answer a few basic questions. The site’s Compatibility Matching System does all the work and narrows your potential partners to only curated matches that are sent to you daily.
Using this site means you will get to see specific data on how compatible you are with a potential partner and whether you should message them already.
Premium members can get to meet each other virtually using the eHarmony Video Date feature – a safe and secure video conferencing app. That means you can be on a date right from the comfort of your home. This is a great way to reduce surprises when you finally get to go on a face-to-face date.
Other interesting features of this site include Guided Communication (to help you determine who is right for you), and Hidden Matches (for filing away matches you don’t really dig, at least temporarily).
Overall, if you are looking for a serious and committed relationship, eHarmony might be your best bet.
2. Match
If you are looking to get “back out there,” then you need a dating site that is serious but not too serious. That’s where Match comes in. This dating site is like the mid-point between marriage-centric dating sites and hookup-centric dating sites.
Launched in 1995, Match was the first-ever online dating service to hit the internet. But don’t be fooled into thinking that the 25-year old site has lost touch with present-day reality. Quite the contrary, Match is currently the most popular and mainstream dating site. In fact, the site is synonymous with online dating.
With over 30 million registered members and about 13 million visits per month, there’s hardly a shortage of interesting people you can meet no matter what you are looking for. Match proudly hold the record for the most online dates, relationships, and even marriages, making it one of the best sites for over 40.
Joining the site is free, but as usual, there’s a paid membership option that gives you full access to all its features. Creating a profile and answering the series of questions during signup can take a while.
However, the questions are quite straightforward, and matches will be sent to you based on your responses (so you need to be honest and specific here). Some people find the landing page for Match a bit less impressive, but that does not take away from its extra depth when it comes to figuring out who best fits your criteria.
With Match, you get to search profiles based on the dating criteria you specify. In addition, you will receive five or more highly compatible matches sent daily to your inbox. In other words, you get the best of both worlds – letting the site do all the work for you or combining that with manually flipping through profiles by yourself.
There’s a “zen mode” feature that lets only people who meet your criteria to contact you. This saves you the trouble of manually filtering out potential partners who may not be a good match for you.
And just in case you need contact support, you can reach the customer service team (made of real humans, not robots) round the clock.
3. Love Again
Looking for love again after forty? What better place to start than, you guessed it, Love Again?
The site helps mature daters find romance and deep connections. It’s simple, and user-friendly design makes it perfect for people older adults who are not as tech-savvy as younger adults. One good thing about the dating service is that members can access it through the web, via the Facebook app, or on their mobile devices.
Interactions and conversations on Love Again can be on forums, chat rooms, video chatting, instant messages, or even through casual “winks.” The mode of interaction on the site creates a natural approach to socializing and removes the awkwardness that usually comes with starting a conversation on dating sites.
You can see who is online now and when they last logged in. Plus, you can view as many profiles as you wish without a paid membership.
Singing up on Love Again is pretty straightforward and short. You can choose to be detailed or minimal when completing your profile.
Overall, Love Again is not as modern and racy as the other dating sites on this list. But why is it included on the list of best dating sites for over 40?
Here’s why.
If you’re already venturing into your 40s and just getting into online dating, most dating sites and apps might seem a bit strange and even overwhelming. Your best bet would be to start from a place where you can test the waters at your own pace without getting frustrated. This is where Love Again comes in.
The dating site allows you to interact with people casually and naturally and form any type of connection you want to make without pressure. In other words, Love Again is the dating site for you if you want to take things slowly.
4. Zoosk
First things first, Zoosk is not popular among the younger crowd, which makes it one of the best dating sites for over 40. You will get to meet women who are not too young and naïve but who have been around the block enough times to know what they truly want in a man.
With over 35 million members spanning across several parts of the world, Zoosk gives you access to single women from many countries. That’s a huge advantage if you have a career that requires you to travel far and wide as that gives you the opportunity to meet single women from different countries.
Zoosk has been in existence for over a decade and has continued to create loving and lasting connections for its members.
Here one feature that sets Zoosk apart from other dating sites. The site can track the validity of users’ photos. How does it do that? All photos are verified to make sure it represents how each user is currently and not how they look some years back. If the photo verification is not successful, you will be asked to upload a video as proof.
This process sets users at ease because the feature will automatically safeguard against possible liars, especially as it has to do with their age and looks.
Another cool feature that improves matches on the site is the propriety “Behavioral Matchmaking” engine. This feature recommends suitors based on how you click around, like, message, wink, and what matters most to you. That means you don’t have to fill out a lengthy questionnaire to determine who meets your criteria.
Although the site requires paid membership to interact with others and enjoy all of its features, most men over 40 who use the site swear by its success. Perhaps this might just be the right dating site for you if you’re an older man.
5. Elite Singles
If you really don’t have the time to go through a plethora of profiles (or simply don’t enjoy it) and are looking for a site that delivers beauty and brains, Elite Singles might be just the right one. First, most users on the site are not just looking for a long-term commitment, but they are also interested in finding someone who is intellectually compatible.
The unique thing about Elite Singles is that every user who signs up goes through a unique personality test to determine their traits. This process is a bit lengthy and for good reasons. The more the site knows about you, the better matches it can recommend.
The good thing is that instead of browsing endlessly through profiles (as is the norm with most dating sites), this site sends you about 3 to 7 reputable matches daily based on the results of your personality test. And all of the suitors are manually verified.
Besides, you get to see a score representing how compatible you are with the matches that Elite Singles recommends. Plus, you can filter and narrow your potential partners using age, height, distance, and others.
Unlike many dating sites with younger adults, about 85% of Elite Single users are between the ages of 30 and 55 years old (and have a degree). In general, this site is for a more mature crowd, making it fit the bill as one of the best dating sites for over 40.
How to Get the Most from Dating Sites
Even the best dating site will not magically make a partner fall heads over heel for you if you ignore certain basic tips. Here are a few of the most important things to keep in mind if you must get the most from dating sites.
Choose Dating Sites Wisely
Choose your site and apps wisely. Thankfully, you don’t need to worry too much about filtering the good from the lame because you’ve already seen the best five dating sites.
Be Real
Want to find someone who truly likes your personality? Be honest. It’s that simple. Be real and honest about who you are and what you want. You don’t have to hype up anything about yourself in your profile. And you definitely don’t need to say things about yourself that are not true.
If anyone doesn’t like you just as you are, well, guess what? They’ve saved you a lot of time and effort.
Being real and honest increases the likelihood of attracting people that will end up liking you.
Choose a Great Profile Photo
If you forget everything about dating sites, don’t forget this one. Never leave your profile photo blank!
Beauty, they say, is in the eyes of the beholder. No lady will want to date a man that doesn’t have a photo on his profile.
Secondly, potential partners will get to see and form a fair opinion about you based on your profile photo. So make sure to use a photo that you are really comfortable with, preferably one with a slight tilt of your head and a genuine smile.
Keep Descriptions Concise
No matter how great you are, no one wants to read an autobiography on a dating site!
Get to the point when writing your profile. Include only really important things about you and be done with it.
Mention what makes you interesting, and what you are looking for in a potential partner. But make it more about you and a little less about what you are looking for. Here’s a fair way to approach this: 70% of your profile should be about you, and 30% should be about the other person’s qualities.
Be Open-Minded
Only inexperienced teenagers and younger adults expect to find someone online with 100% of everything they want in a partner. However, anyone over 40 knows that it is just a pipe dream.
Just because a woman doesn’t have the same hobby as you doesn’t mean you should give up on her. You could learn new things and grow in new ways from a potential partner you met online. So keep an open mind even if your potential match isn’t everything you want.
And come to think of it, you might not be everything she wants, too, you know. The bottom line is this: long-term relationships depend a lot on how both partners are open and willing to learn and grow.
Avoid Generic Conversations and Get to Know Potential Partners
You are on a dating site because you want to know and meet someone that means something to you. So, make an effort to know them. Ask about their likes and dislikes or something in their profile. There’s no need to dance around for too long.
Regardless of how long you drag online interactions, there are certain aspects of people you can’t know from online conversations. Consider keeping your pre-face-to-face exchanges to about two weeks or thereabout.
Pro Tips
Finding and using any one of these best dating sites for over 40 is cool. But you know what’s even better? Building a steady relationship with the women you meet on these sites.
Here are some pro tips that will not only improve your results with dating sites but will also help you create lasting relationships.
Check the Last Login Date Before Making Contact
Always check the last login date before sending a message to any woman you meet online. Here’s why. It’s usually a sheer waste of your precious time trying to contact women who haven’t been active online within the last week. They’ve probably found a steady date and are no longer interested in meeting anyone new. Regardless of your preferred dating site, always remember to use the search filter option to sort matches by last the login date. Give more attention to people who are currently online or have logged into their accounts within the last 24 hours.
Your First Message is Crucial
Getting your profile all set up is a great way to start. But that’s just the first step. The next step is to send a message to someone you think might be a match.
Your first message is the most important one. It could be a deal-breaker if it is crafted wrongly. And it also could be the beginning of a budding relationship if done properly.
You need to make sure it is not a random one. Tailor your message to the individual you are writing to and let it reflect your goals, too.
If your potential match comes across like they are not too confident (you can judge that just by looking at her picture!), it would be best not to tease them by being overly flattering. Also, avoid giving a physical complement to a beautiful and confident woman. It is less likely to make an impact on her because she’s probably heard that a zillion times!
A good starting point would be a non-sexual compliment or anything to do with their physical appearance, for that matter. In fact, your best bet would be to show interest in something from a woman’s profile beside her the profile photo.
Make Her Want a Second Date
So, you’ve got her attention and have even gone on a first real one-on-one date (not on Skype or any other virtual date). What next?
This is where most socially inept men self-sabotage the relationship. If all you do is go on a first date, get laid, and hop back online in search of another pretty face, you’ll never build something steady (unless, of course, that’s your goal, to begin with.)
There is no judgment here, but if you are still not ready for a serious commitment at over 40, you probably will not be ready even at 60! In other words, even the best dating sites for over 40 can’t magically turn you into someone you’re not or unwilling to become. These sites will only help you get dates, period!
Sorry, I digressed, but for a good reason. Now, back to second dates.
How do you make someone you met online and have gone on a first date want to go out with you again? A good place to start is by coming up with creative second date ideas.
Don’t know how to do that? Don’t worry. I’ve got you covered. Check out over 50 of the very best second date ideas that can take your new relationship to the next level. Spoiler alert: ideas number 4 and 16 will make you her hero – her knight in shining armor!
Keep in mind that dating sites are there to help you up to your first date. Whatever you do after that is entirely up to you.
Be On Her Mind as She Goes to Bed
Whether or not you’ve proceeded from online chats to meeting one-on-one, a good way to keep things interesting between both of you is to plant yourself in her mind right before she retires for the day.
You can do this by sending her goodnight texts. Remember to always write direct and personal messages. Don’t ever make the mistake of sending a generic message to her because it won’t have the type of impact you hope to create.
You could copy it from any app for all she cares! The more personal you make your messages, the more charming the effects will be on her.
And even if you forget to call or text her during the day, make it an almost daily routine to send her nightly texts. This way, she’ll look forward to your message and think about you before she sleeps.
